Remotely standing by you with my vibrant, sturdy umbrella large enough to cover a village. Wearing my photochromic sunglasses, singing a Huey Lewis tune as I paddle upstream with a teaspoon.
Thank you Glow for opening my closed eyes and reminding me even the clouds run out of rain eventually.
I hear you. My mom was diagnosed with MSA, multi-system atrophy, 7 years ago and it was a long slow scary process to go through with her. It definitely makes a person take stock. I am close in age to you and do not have children either. I've been following you for a long time and can relate you your story on lots of levels. You're not alone. I've never met you in real life but you've already shown up for me in ways that have made a real difference. Take good care and take it day by day. I'm here if you need an ear.
Thank you for your kind words. Day by day seems to be the way to go, but it is so hard when I am stuck in all the "what ifs." Trying to breathe and take care of myself as well. Yesterday was a good day. xxM
I am glad yesterday was good. Omg this What It's would do me in sometimes. Some things were important to think about and plan for, others were not, and I had no way of knowing in the moment. I just went with the flow and did the best I could for my mom. I'll be thinking of you today. ❤️
I’m sorry to hear about your Mom’s health issues. I know when my Dad’s health went off a cliff last fall it was a hard wake-up call. First time he’d ever been to an ER or hospital. Loads of decisions to be made in a flurry. Your Mom is so fortunate to have you able and willing to help her navigate all the changes. Watching many elderly in the hospital with no family I just wonder how they make it in this very complicated world we call healthcare. Being so far away of course makes it harder for you. Know that your community will always be there to support
and help whenever you need it. Sending love and hugs.
I see it every day at my own job. So many people are navigating this on their own. And it's terrifying to think of how many people go home alone and can't do simple tasks for themselves, and they suffer alone. It's what keeps me up at night - all the resources they don't know about - but also all the resources WE the children, don't know about. The resources need to be easier to find.
Caring for single parents long distance is heartbreaking at best. Hang in there Mia; I'm sure it feels like you just awake into chaos daily. As the others have said, you will never die alone without friends because you have already made that decision. Your mom is really lucky to have you as her daughter. Keep focusing on the sun. Love you ❤️
Thank you, Tracy. I know you know how this goes. And I am trying to see the positive that I get this time with her. I get to help her. Grasping for gratitude. love you - let's make a date soon :)
This could not have come at a better time, same boat with my dad who is far away and finally agreeing to move closer, but is too old to manage it on his own, it is so hard, was feeling very alone this morning, I don't have any friends going through this, it's crushingly difficult to see a parent like this, trying your best, still feel helpless, thank God for my husband, great post. Sending you all the sun.
"Crushingly difficult" is a perfect way to describe this. I am sorry you feel alone in this - know there are many of us searching for resources as well as our own rest. I am trying to think of a way to get others to collaborate on any elder care resources in their state, or just information that they found useful in this process.
This is a great idea. I have been collecting resources for when he arrives, his current state, and planning for the future, there is actually a really helpful group on FB that is local called supporting our aging relatives - over 8K members, and is this in Atlanta area, full of gen x caregivers. Feeling lost everyday, but we are def not alone.
Everything happens for a reason. I hope your mom heals very soon and that you find the road back to your circle of friends. I now for sure you won’t end up alone !! Love ya ❤️
I definitely feel incredibly supported by my friends, but it's that commune, IRL connection I crave. We don't have many of our ride or dies near us. The idea of a large group of friends all living near each other - helping, caring, connecting - that's a dream right now :)
Going through much of the same. Have an aging father I take care of long distance and am living with husband no kids in LA. I fly to care for my dad once a month. My husband and I are isolated. I don't think COVID helped. We got too comfortable staying in. And being sober means hitting the pillow much earlier than I did in the past.
I am struggling with how I will keep on top of things from the other coast, and will also be traveling back east much more often until we can figure out another solution. As a nurse, I see so many patients alone, navigating the hardest time of their lives, and I know that we are so lucky to have one another, no matter how hard it is. Your father is so lucky to have you. I also hear you on the staying home, not drinking, going to bed early - that I see as a blessing, to care for ourselves in a simple way. And it's not that we have isolated from our friends - I think people in general have been affected similarly- more and more people choose to stay home, or cancel plans last minute, and/or have let their social life live entirely online. I think it's a cultural thing now - and I fear it only getting worse.
Sending sun rays your way.
Remotely standing by you with my vibrant, sturdy umbrella large enough to cover a village. Wearing my photochromic sunglasses, singing a Huey Lewis tune as I paddle upstream with a teaspoon.
Thank you Glow for opening my closed eyes and reminding me even the clouds run out of rain eventually.
Namafuckinste
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I hear you. My mom was diagnosed with MSA, multi-system atrophy, 7 years ago and it was a long slow scary process to go through with her. It definitely makes a person take stock. I am close in age to you and do not have children either. I've been following you for a long time and can relate you your story on lots of levels. You're not alone. I've never met you in real life but you've already shown up for me in ways that have made a real difference. Take good care and take it day by day. I'm here if you need an ear.
Thank you for your kind words. Day by day seems to be the way to go, but it is so hard when I am stuck in all the "what ifs." Trying to breathe and take care of myself as well. Yesterday was a good day. xxM
I am glad yesterday was good. Omg this What It's would do me in sometimes. Some things were important to think about and plan for, others were not, and I had no way of knowing in the moment. I just went with the flow and did the best I could for my mom. I'll be thinking of you today. ❤️
I’m sorry to hear about your Mom’s health issues. I know when my Dad’s health went off a cliff last fall it was a hard wake-up call. First time he’d ever been to an ER or hospital. Loads of decisions to be made in a flurry. Your Mom is so fortunate to have you able and willing to help her navigate all the changes. Watching many elderly in the hospital with no family I just wonder how they make it in this very complicated world we call healthcare. Being so far away of course makes it harder for you. Know that your community will always be there to support
and help whenever you need it. Sending love and hugs.
I see it every day at my own job. So many people are navigating this on their own. And it's terrifying to think of how many people go home alone and can't do simple tasks for themselves, and they suffer alone. It's what keeps me up at night - all the resources they don't know about - but also all the resources WE the children, don't know about. The resources need to be easier to find.
Sending love right back to you friend
Caring for single parents long distance is heartbreaking at best. Hang in there Mia; I'm sure it feels like you just awake into chaos daily. As the others have said, you will never die alone without friends because you have already made that decision. Your mom is really lucky to have you as her daughter. Keep focusing on the sun. Love you ❤️
Thank you, Tracy. I know you know how this goes. And I am trying to see the positive that I get this time with her. I get to help her. Grasping for gratitude. love you - let's make a date soon :)
This could not have come at a better time, same boat with my dad who is far away and finally agreeing to move closer, but is too old to manage it on his own, it is so hard, was feeling very alone this morning, I don't have any friends going through this, it's crushingly difficult to see a parent like this, trying your best, still feel helpless, thank God for my husband, great post. Sending you all the sun.
"Crushingly difficult" is a perfect way to describe this. I am sorry you feel alone in this - know there are many of us searching for resources as well as our own rest. I am trying to think of a way to get others to collaborate on any elder care resources in their state, or just information that they found useful in this process.
Sending the sun right back to you
This is a great idea. I have been collecting resources for when he arrives, his current state, and planning for the future, there is actually a really helpful group on FB that is local called supporting our aging relatives - over 8K members, and is this in Atlanta area, full of gen x caregivers. Feeling lost everyday, but we are def not alone.
Everything happens for a reason. I hope your mom heals very soon and that you find the road back to your circle of friends. I now for sure you won’t end up alone !! Love ya ❤️
I definitely feel incredibly supported by my friends, but it's that commune, IRL connection I crave. We don't have many of our ride or dies near us. The idea of a large group of friends all living near each other - helping, caring, connecting - that's a dream right now :)
Sending you love B
I hope you can make it happen. And you can if that is your dream. Make it happen. It would be great. 😊
Going through much of the same. Have an aging father I take care of long distance and am living with husband no kids in LA. I fly to care for my dad once a month. My husband and I are isolated. I don't think COVID helped. We got too comfortable staying in. And being sober means hitting the pillow much earlier than I did in the past.
I am struggling with how I will keep on top of things from the other coast, and will also be traveling back east much more often until we can figure out another solution. As a nurse, I see so many patients alone, navigating the hardest time of their lives, and I know that we are so lucky to have one another, no matter how hard it is. Your father is so lucky to have you. I also hear you on the staying home, not drinking, going to bed early - that I see as a blessing, to care for ourselves in a simple way. And it's not that we have isolated from our friends - I think people in general have been affected similarly- more and more people choose to stay home, or cancel plans last minute, and/or have let their social life live entirely online. I think it's a cultural thing now - and I fear it only getting worse.